


He's got a soul as sweet as blood red jam

by heavenisalibrary



Series: Tumblr Prompt Fills [5]
Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Ficlet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-13
Updated: 2014-03-13
Packaged: 2018-01-15 15:03:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1309192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heavenisalibrary/pseuds/heavenisalibrary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I can’t believe you’re the old-fashioned, saving-it-for-the-one type."</p><p>"I wouldn’t put it like that,” he says.</p><p>"I would," River says, grinning. "It’s hilarious."</p>
            </blockquote>





	He's got a soul as sweet as blood red jam

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt: Doctor/River, secretly a virgin.

"I’m eleven — twelve — nearly thirteen hundred years old!” the Doctor exclaims, flailing quite a bit as he tries to escape a rather cross looking River Song — he’s seen her decimate an army with a handmade slingshot and a box of raisinets. When she looks angry, he’s long since learned to reach minimum safe distance.

"I know that, which is why I’m so shocked,” she says. “Honestly, I know all about you, Doctor. Lots of horrible things that I find far less appalling than this.”

"I’m thirteen hundred years old! That’s two thousand years minus seven thousand! There are stars younger than me, and if you think I’m going to admit to being a…" here he pauses, reaching up to fuss with the bow tie that was actually strewn across the console where River had left it after removing it. "If you think I’m going to admit to being a _virgin_ , you’re even more mad than I thought you were.”

"Admit to it — ?! Sweetie, it’s not like you can hide it, it’s written all over your face! You’re quite adept at the kissing part and the hands aren’t half bad, but the moment I get my hand anywhere near your trousers you balk like I tried to shove dynamite down there!”

"Now, don’t go getting any ideas," the Doctor says, wagging his finger at her as he paces toward her on those ridiculously bandy legs. "And anyway, I’m not a — shut up, you, stop looking at me like I’m some kind of child! Nearly two thousand, River, I could’ve had tea with your oldest ancestors!”

"You could do that anyway," River says, "you’ve got a time machine, not that you could land in time for tea with anyone, anyway. Stay on point, old man. We’ve got to talk this out."

"We haven’t got to talk anything out, River! Everything is fine. I’m fine, you’re fine, we’re fine together if you’d stop prying. I’m not a virgin.”

"You’re blushing, honey."

"I’m angry, dear. It’s a flush. Not a blush.”

"Eh," River says, shrugging, "they rhyme. Basically the same word, all told."

"It’s not!”

"Stay on point," River scolds, stepping toward him to swat his arm. "You can be honest with me, Doctor. Always and completely. Are you — have you ever had sex before?"

The Doctor blinks at her. He scratches the side of his face, stares at the ceiling, shifts his weight from foot to foot before finally sighing. “We wove our children on looms, on Gallifrey. There wasn’t any _need_ for sex when I was younger.”

"And then?"

"And then…" he trailed off, gesturing elaborately around him. "And then, I don’t know! I never felt like it. There wasn’t anybody for a long time, and then there was Rose but our — our relationship wasn’t _like_ that, I never wanted to — I’d have felt like a pedophile, dear, she was only human,” he says, throwing his hands up in exasperation.

“ _Only_ human?”

"You know what I mean," he says, waving his hand to dismiss her slightly offended expression. "She was not even an eighth of my age!”

"You don’t know how old I am," River pointed out. "Do you — is that what this is? You don’t want to have sex with me, either?"

“ _No!_ " he shouts. River raises a brow and cringes back slightly from the volume so close to her face. The Doctor sighs and places his hands on her shoulders, then slides on hand up to lift her chin and make her look at him. "No, that’s not it. I don’t know how old you are, but I know you’re much older than you look. And I know everything you’ve been through, the way your mind works — you are every bit my equal. Which isn’t to say even remotely that I fancied myself superior to Rose or any other human — _certainly_ not — just running on a different frequency."

"Okay," River says, nodding at him. "Okay. Now that we’ve established that you’re a virgin —"

"Can we not use that word? I was a grand-father, you know.”

River rolls her eyes. “Now that we’ve established… whatever, we ought to do something about it.”

The Doctor takes a deep breath, looking at her warily as she steps closer to him. “Yes,” he says, “we ought.”

"Are you sure, sweetie?" she says, her voice suddenly soft. She places a chaste kiss against his lips. "I know I reacted… strongly, but I would never want you to do anything you don’t want to do.”

“River,” he says, cupping her face in his hands, “this has never been about not wanting you. I hope you haven’t had that silly thought knocking around in there for long.”

"Not terribly long," River says. He can tell by the way she shifts her weight that she’s lying. "We’ve just been on so many dates — we’re married, for heaven’s sake — and I’m always the one who makes the move, and you’re always the one who pulls away. I thought, perhaps —"

He cuts her off with a kiss. He might not know a thing about sex, but kissing he’s very good at — he lets himself relax into it in the way that he usually doesn’t, pulling her body against his and opening his mouth to her, running his tongue along the roof of her mouth, sucking her lower lip into his mouth, kissing her until she’s whimpering against his lips and he pulls away with a few glancing kisses. When she looks at him, her eyes are hooded and dark.

"You are beautiful," he says, "setting aside how much I love you — just you, the way you are, your personality, your temper, talking to you — you must know how beautiful you are. There isn’t an artist on any planet at any point in time that could ever capture your likeness and do it justice. I could stare at you reading a book for hours, and have done, and never get bored. The way you walk, the way you look at me — the way you make me feel has always, always terrified me.”

"Then why didn’t you say so?"

"I didn’t want you to know that I’m a — a —"

"Virgin," she supplies.

"Right. I didn’t want you to know. I thought you’d be disappointed. Time Lords were always too clinical to me — not enough emotion, not enough tactility. Resistant to the sort of intimacy I’ve always craved. Humans have always been too much and too brief. You, River," he says, pausing to place a kiss on her nose, and when she closes her eyes, one to each eyelid. "Well, we’re bespoke."

"I can’t believe you’re the old-fashioned, saving-it-for-The-One type."

"I wouldn’t put it like that,” he says.

"I would," River says, grinning. "It’s hilarious."

"Shut up," he says.

"Make me," she says, her voice dropping low. This time, when her hand reaches the band of his trousers, he swallows, but doesn’t move.

"I will," he promises, "oh, I will."


End file.
